So you're minding your own business, doing things that wholesome women do I'm sure. All of a sudden, your phone alerts you. You go to look at it, expecting your girl to be asking what you're doing at the moment or your mom to question whether or not you've eaten anything today....but no ma'am. You open up your message to be greeted by and UNexpected, UNsolicited, UNinvited PENIS!! Yes....you have now been a victim of the rapidly spreading DICK PIC PLAGUE.
Now, let's be honest...in the right setting, the male genitalia can be a beautiful thing. But chile, my iMessages, E-mail, DM's...ALL of those are places that a peen just shouldn't wander into. I don't know about you, but I've never seen a dick pic and been like "Oh goodness....it's so beautiful. How do you keep it so presentable?" NO! One, I think all of them are eye sores (no matter how big or small, the things just aren't nice to look at) and Two, I find it offensive when a man takes it upon himself to send a picture of his member to me.
When I meet a man, I make it a point to try to get to know the him from the inside out. I try my best to really stimulate their minds and steer the conversation as far away from the superficial as I can. Let me be more clear...I don't TRY to...I DO because that's who I am. I've never been a woman whose been solely intrigued off of good looks, careers, or material things. Now looks may get him in the door, but that intellect is what will keep me around. And sex? Well, I try to put the sex talk off as long as possible because it may give off the vibe that "I'm about that life" or all I want is something physical. Now, when I say sex talk, I mean simply talking about sex. Not sexting or having phone sex..but engaging in a conversation about small details of my sex life and what not. As I get older, I've become more comfortable with the topic because sex is a huge part of life and it's something that will inevitably be discussed. The tricky part is knowing who you can and can not discuss it with.
Since I've been single these past 2 years...I've dated a few different guys. Some of them can have the sex talk and still be totally into the rest of you and can discern the fact that you are not the freak of their wildest pornographic dreams. But SOME men.....if you say to them "Well idk, sometimes I like it rough, depending on how I'm feeling" they NEVER stop imagining themselves flipping you upside down, but naked, with hand cuffs and heels on. They get SO overwhelmed with the thought of sexing you senseless that they pull down their pants, get that phone in the right angle, and snap it up! Next thing you know...you've got a sex organ in your phone and you're left to think...."Does this guy think I'm a hoe?"
There are some who just up and send their peens without a preface at all...either way it all says to me "I'm not interested in your mind, I'm only curious about that cake."
I just find it completely disrespectful because I've not given them the impression that I'm all about sex. In fact, I stray away from discussing the physical. So why would you think I'm the kind of woman who even cares what your peen looks like? It's like their saying "Forget your religious talks and my personal goals....I want you to get into this D**K".
But NO SIR!
I am a woman...a strong one with a mind that ventures far beyond this carnally ruled world we live in. You want to impress me? Send me a picture of your 5 year plan. Forward your favorite bible quote that you live by. Shoot, text me to simply say you're thinking about me. And if you feel like you're doing too much or that "you ain't tryna love these hoes"...then sir, I'm here to tell you that I'm not the one for you and that's quite alright. But don't you ever send me your d**k. Respect that.
The punch line of it all is, men want to act funny when you don't react the way they expected. I mean, you're the fool who sent yourself out and thought I was gonna get all hot in the pants! WELL NAW! You fellas need to start asking every time before you set yourselves up for pride and penile embarrassment! I'm ALWAYS gonna respond with that monkey emoji with his hands covering his eyes and a simple "lol". No exclamation mark. Because I didn't want to see it and from this moment on.....you're a joke. Sorry...not sorry.
So ladies, here's your warning: A man that will send you a dick pic ONLY wants you to reciprocate the exact thing. Don't waste your beautiful mind on him...all he can fathom is you naked and in some unGodly position. And men...I'm not knocking you if that's what you're on...however...find a freak that will be enthused by the details of your penis. It's simply not for everybody.